July 2018 to now.

It's been nearly a year since I posted last. With four posts last year, and this the first posted in 2019--

The short version of the past year is this: Tiny Cat chose to live inside with us; six months later, he vanished; his family nearly all vanished; I've been struggling with depression for many months...

I did get a new shrink. So that worked out. :) Except for the other problem, which is that I appear to be speeding BACK into effin' hypomania. Again. Not my current doctor's fault, he is very good at working with me, unlike the previous few doctors.

More on my health later...


Looking back, I posted about the cats and our cat colony, so I'm glad I documented it at least. :/ Having one beloved cat disappear, and then not just one more cat, but four more--! It takes a toll on you.

Gatito was just a couple days away from his first birthday, dammit!

I tried not to get close to his cousins -- Shadow had her second litter two years after her first -- but I failed.

I loved Cali, little scamp that she was.  She somehow projected an aura of "small human girl in a pinafore" as she rocketed around.  You could feel her determination as she did whatever she wanted, all the time, and focused intensely on those things. Beautiful little bratling, Cali was. Dammit...

Lists and surviving ADHD...

Instead of blogging about the cats [alas!] or other things, like copyediting or rants... today I'm doing an informational blog post. This is for my reference as well as anyone else, of course. 8)

It's also so I can close more tabs. :b

Ferret syndrome: BAD.

Still having hypomania... as previously reported.

Today I haven't yet eaten, but am not ravenous, a win for me, since the voracious hunger has been waking me up mornings for days now. Over a week, I'd say... possibly up to the last fortnight-plus.

I suspect the meds ramped up my metabolism something fierce.

Dumb meds... AGAIN. :(

First -- do not panic.  (I'm a little panicky, but it's because this is stressful for me.) This too shall pass, I'll be better.


I'm hypomanic.

I stopped my new med this weekend. I was having problems sleeping -- as in sleeping longer, and/or being awakened earlier and earlier. I need sleep, dammit!

Saturday I noticed that I was talking faster, interrupting people (often), which meant I'd have to stop myself and let others finish what they were saying -- or trying to say.

I was doing that again today, at chiro. 8(

"I don't understand..."

~ Authoritarians and being susceptible ~

I'm reading a fascinating article that's somewhat scary.  It's about people who are afraid, who let themselves be ruled by fear.

Fear that the world will change, that the status quo will change, that The Other will triumph.

The article is about the authoritarian desire to feel safe by "destroying" the threat[s] with a strongman leader, or who claims to be, who promises to do drastic things to "solve" the problems.

Even when they are foolish impossible things offered as solutions.